Friday, June 16, 2006

How to fool 'em all ...

I have made the case, in discussions with friends, that someone who might have been born on the wrong side of the tracks, so to speak, with little education or experience, little or no money, but who might wish to appear educated, cultured, and affluent, can do so easily. We don't hold each other up to very high standards anymore, unfortunately. So, want to advance yourself in this world of ours? It's simple, really. Here is what to do:

  • Males: Never wear a mullet.
  • Females: Big hair is out, and has been for eons.
  • Don't use double negatives in speech or writing. Ever.
  • Know when to use I and when to use me.
  • Know the difference between your and you're.
  • Know when to use their, they're or there.
  • Know the difference between then and than.
  • If, in conversation, you don't know what everyone else is talking about, don't speak.
  • In general, spend more time listening than speaking
  • Try to keep profanity out of your speaking and writing
  • Say please and thank you, and know when each is appropriate
That's it. Follow these simple rules and you will be seen as a classy guy or gal, smarter than average, and a good date/friend/employee prospect.

This has been a public service announcement. You're welcome.


  1. I enjoy your blog because of your direct, no-nonsense style. I appreciate how you write of things which are thought provoking. (I found your blog because you listed Atlas Shrugged as a favorite novel, which is also one of mine. There aren't many people who believe in excellence without excuse any more, are there?) Anyway, these simple rules of yours are what I tell my students all the time. It's in their best interest to listen.

  2. Thanks, Bellezza. Nice comments are always welcome and appreciated. I visited your blog and liked what I saw there too. It is fun to read slice-of-my-life blog posts. We learn from others. I am making note of your URL and will add you, and some others I have been saving up, to my blogroll when I get a few spare minutes.

  3. I hope you aren't offended if I add you as well...Bellezza

  4. One point that might bare adding: Show up at the interview with proper attire, or atleast dressed casually nice.
    Save the team colors, Mr. T jewelry collection and baggy jeans hanging halfway down your @$$ for "Da big game" (no matter how white and clean they may be). These things tend to generate the undesirable impression the applicant is a dope pusher, and cost him/her the opportunity at hand!

  5. Good points. What are these people thinking?

  6. Bathing and wearing the right size clothing are also big pluses.

  7. Frankly Sieg, I'd be greatly surprised if thinking even enters into the picture in the majority of the situations to which my earlier comment relates...
    Logical thinking, anyway!
    Most of these birds seem to be of the Cynthia McKinney variety.